What is Wrong?

It's been a month already. I haven't had a GOOD sleep. Either I roll in bed for several hours to fall asleep or I would wake up every hour and go back to sleep. It's been annoying. It's probably anxiety here and there.
I'm trying to relax a bit more, but I seem to be a bit tense still.
What is exactly bothering me?

I'm onto my second summer reading book, Dinner at the Homesick Restaurant by Anne Tyler. I need to write journal entries for The Glass Castle though. I will go back to that later, but soon.

I still need to check with a couple of my friends about the Calculus packet. I need to start those college essays. ugh. I do not have a first choice college yet exactly. I'm just pondering on eight options right now. No college has stunned me exactly. But you are talking about setting up the next four years of your life at this exact college and this college can set up your future career path. It's a BIG decision to make. I'm probably more nervous than the excited that all my friends talk about.

Marching band season started last week already. I wrote sixty-four drills already- for my entire section. It was all right, I guess, but as I moved along into it, my hand started to hurt severely again (nothing new) and I noticed that I couldn't count for my life. haha.

My arms have been in pain more often now.

SATs have been a drag. I need to move on that more. I am determined.

Just two weeks ago, I had this dream. I have been pondering about it. What is it trying to say exactly? And just last night, I had another dream. It was odd, but I seemed happy in it. Is this dream trying to say something too?

All my friends have been having love trouble- boy trouble and girl trouble. Love is a toughy. It entertains me, yet I wonder why some of them are wasting their time on that certain person. My friends seek for advice- yet it's ironic here. I never really had any experience with "love" exactly. I help them however I can though. Love is just plainly complicated. I never really have any trouble, at least not yet. I'm glad though. I can't take another burden on my shoulders. I'm stressed enough.

It's funny how people can be so fake.
A friend says she's not my friend, yet she still talks to me. I just ignore and avoid. How fake do people get? It's annoying, yet amusing. Very amusing.

Summer's almost over. It's already August. Soon, it's back to school. Fun, fun!

Plans

I have a goal to reach.
I am afraid of not being accepted into any college, so I am trying to reach for a higher SAT score. I decided to take the ACT too. I heard it is supposedly somewhat easier.
MY PLAN: STUDY, STUDY, STUDY THE SAT AND ACT FOR THE REST OF THE SUMMER

P.S. note to self: I can NOT bail out on this. It determines my future happiness here...

I'm STILL Awake, Was Thinking, "Let Go?"

Why am I still awake? lol.
My summer days... let's see, they start out at noon and end at 2 or 3 a.m. wow.
Maybe I should try to be a normal person and sleep at a normal time and wake up at a normal time.

Since I'm still awake and I'm not feeling tired whatsoever...
I'm thinking it's time to let go just about now.
I've been thinking.
It's been a whole year already.
I think it was my fault... I let the chance go. I had my reasons to say no though.
You've been amazing. You're funny, nice, and definitely know how to make me laugh.
I know I hurt you badly. Well, my and your friends have "yelled" [well noted] that what I did was harsh and hurtful.
Now that I think about it though, I think what I did was good. Well good for you.
I did not waste your time... even though you are still on my mind at times.

I truly remember your words at all times. When I'm down, I think about the words you have said to me. It helps. :)

But, I think it's time to let go now......... [even though my friend just told me that you are still thinking about me too, but who knows? only you do and I do. Oh wells. But I feel that we will always be great friends forever.] Time to let go now...

Time to Start

Hey there!

Summerrrrr! It's a great sound! A break from school! School's out! Chillen! Friends&Family!
Icecream! BBQ! Hang outs! Late night chats!~

Althought it's been all fun...
I believe that summer started for about a week and 6 days already.
I chilled around the house, hung out with the family on 4th of July, and cleaned the house.
I did not do much just yet.
I do not want to waste my time doing nothing my whole summer.
I need a plan... for this week...

1. Start "The Glass Castle" -Jeannette Walls
2. Practice MB Music- Let's focus on Movement Two this week, shall we?
3. Study for SAT/ACT.................... I feel like this will be on my to do list the entire summer. ughhhh.
4. RUN!!!

I believe 4 on this list is just enough! ;]

Let's see if I kept this promise and fulfilled this to do list by the end of the week...